Empty. See 5-15-08 for reference.

This blog is taking a sabbatical.
Nobody reads it anyhow.



One week ago today I started testing chocolate. A former student mailed me two KitKat bars from Japan and I ate the one flavored strawberry. After that I felt fine, so indulged in more. One week later, I am officially allowed to each chocolate! No migraines all week. Considering the emotional week I've had, this is really good.

Now it's 11pm and I'm very sad, angry, anxious, confused, and my heart aches from the inside out.

5-29-08 Passport Redux Day

Now this is better. At first I had Jes take some photos of me up against a piece of white watercolor paper taped to the door in the laundry room, but she got up so close my nose looked big due to the fisheye effect of the lens. So, I set up my tripod and put it back by the window and used the time release to take a self portrait for my new passport.

Now, if only I could go somewhere interesting so I can use it! Canada!

Lost is on tonight and I'm gearing up for a popcorn-filled three hours of vice. Jes will be out- I hope the Squirt is home to keep me company. Dan, however, will be looking at the stars from his campsite in New Mexico. Hey, he gets an Internet connection, maybe he can watch the re-run tomorrow night!

Here's a photo of my to-do list (half of it)!

5-28-08 Passport Day

What evil monster took hold of my face and turned into that of an old woman? From 1995 to 2008, my passport photo modification looks like something from a horror film. It's embarrasing to post this transformation! Why am I doing this? It's just so shocking to see myself age like this from one passport to another. When I look in the mirror, and I hope that when my husband looks at me- there is a certain timeless beauty. This beauty is stolen by this horrid passport photo taken today and paid for. $14 for this cruel joke! Should I put on some makeup and pay $14 more to have it re-done? Should I find a white wall and set up a tripod to do it myself? Or is this just what I look like? Ug. Maybe I was cuter with short hair after all...

It's all vanity and I know it.





Today my rose bush bloomed, or at least I noticed that it bloomed. I also planted the flowers Kathy gave me. It was a busy day and Jes and I went to meditation class this evening which had a calming effect. I got a call from Dan when he was an hour outside Santa Fe, and heard him describe the snow capped mountains in the distance. Snow in New Mexico, flowers in Virginia.


For years I've tried to clean my shower, and it finally got to the point of no return. It had to be dissected. Taking things apart is what I do best. Putting them back together is a different challenge altogether. But I did it! Twice! It seems that the glass door is not a perfect rectangle, and I had to install the door twice before it would close correctly. It took all day, but kept me busy. Not that I'm trying to distract myself from feeling sad, anxious, and lonely... I'm just trying to make the best of a difficult situation. Tomorrow, I caulk.





Dan left this morning. We all sat around the kitchen table crying afterwards, blowing our noses and piling up wads of tissues in the middle of the table. After a while I told the kids I'd take them driving in their dad's car so they could learn stick. Jes went first and she was quite jerky. Squirt went next, and he had beginner's luck. We went around a parking lot until some freak started doing circles in the middle of the parking lot. Jes drove in our neighborhood. I think she has the hang of it, except on hills.

Later that afternoon, Squirt asked for the axe we'd hidden for years since a near-tree chopping. I said NO, that I would never tell him where it was. He proceeded to search the whole house, then announced that he KNEW it was in the attic, went to get a ladder, climbed up it, and found all the dangerous things we'd hidden there from him for 10 years.

I feel empty inside.





Today was packing day. Dan loaded up the minivan with all his food and equipment for the trip. We went to dinner at Belmont Barbeque, and had a Ben and Jerry's scoop for dessert. I cried on and off all day. Woke up from a nightmare. My heart actually hurts when I think of him leaving in the morning. I wonder how long it will take for me to not hurt. He leaves in the morning.



Today is Dan's birthday. I spent most of the day at school doing interviews then came home to make crawfish etouffee, his favorite meal, with an awesome spinach salad with bacon, red onions, toasted almonds, strawberries, and homemade poppyseed dressing. Mmmmm. Our friends came over and we had a nice birthday dinner. Dan got a GPS from me, and some traveling books and journals from the kids. He's excited about his trip. I'm scared. This photo is of one design a student did during my pilot study.



Today I burned 25 copies of a movie I'd made about my trip with my students to Port Isobel, an island in the Chesapeake Bay. Dan helped me burn them- it took all day. I delivered them to the school and hope the students enjoy the memories. That was a fantastic trip. See October 29-November 1st 2007 for some photos.

5-18-08 The Party

We had a big party with Jes's roomate and her family. The house was so full of food and people! Here are some good photos from the event.


It was cold and rainy, but at least we got to see Jes walking down the lawn from our seats. It took an hour for all the students to process in. It was like a parade with colored banners and balloons and all the different robes. Afterwards we went to her departmental ceremony where she received her diploma.

After the graduation we had a big party with Jes's roommate and her family. The house was so full of food and people! Here are some good photos from the event.


We were invited to a Legacy Breakfast at Alumni Hall because Jes is considered a legacy student. My mom graduated from the university in 1957, Dan in 1998, and me in 1992-- all with master's degrees. Here are Mom and Dan and Jes. Cav Man was out front and we had fun posing with him too.

5-15-08 Tubing the Rivanna Day

Oh yeah, on the 15th Jes and her friends went tubing/rafting down the river. The were gone a long time and we got very worried. Dan went out looking for them. They showed up wet and muddy, smelling like goose poo right before I too started looking. Jes is a certified river guide, so we were really being over protective.


Aza's friend visited this weekend and brought some gifts for Dan's travels. One gift was glowsticks. Here's one we were playing with. Squirt decided to dissect one and took out the inner glass core.


An entire corner of our bedroom is taken up with Dan's traveling supplies. It's a constant reminder of what is to come.

Oh yeah, on the 15th Jes and her friends went tubing/rafting down the river. The were gone a long time and we got very worried. Dan went out looking for them. They showed up wet and muddy, smelling like goose poo right before I too started looking. Jes is a certified river guide, so we were really being over protective.


Cute poster and penguin dwelling. The pilot study is going well except I'm getting a bad cold and the stress of the upcoming week is getting to me. My proposal defense is Friday and I'm not ready.

5-11-08 Mother's Day

An assortment of photos from today. Jes and Squirt decided to frolick in the rain, although Squirt said, "I'll go out in the rain with you, but I'm not going to frolick." Little sister at the piano, Aza and T cooking in the kitchen, Frisbee snuggled in my bed. Family gathered for Sunday Mother's Day Brunch.


Jes and her friend went to a wedding reception and I took a picture like it was prom or something. They thought it was silly. Dad and J and S are here this weekend, as is Aza's new friend, T.

5-9-08 Opening Night

Jes had her opening tonight at a gallery in town. She had 10 photos from her study of the inner lives of 7th grade girls.

First photo is an ice penguin dwelling designed by one of the 8th grade student teams.


I can't remember why I took this picture today. Must have been driving by the Rotunda.


Which soda can will stay cool longest? This is the first demo we did in the pilot study which is a mirror of my dissertation study. The kids all guessed Aluminum Foil. They were wrong.


Squirt mowing the lawn. I'm going to put this picture in his follow-up scoliosis video.